A Difficult Goodbye

The kids and I shared bed last night (as usual). Gillis woke me up around 1AM and said ”Mommy, I found Sally’s dummy next to me. You should take it so it doesn’t disappear because she’ll probably want it later.” Those words are so much like Gillis. Always putting Sally first. I recognise my own relationship to my younger brother. I was always making sure he was okay.

We got up around half past 7. Got ourselves ready and went to the hotel breakfast. We have a tradition that means you can always have nutella when you stay at hotels (not for me though, otherwise half my year would be nutella breakfasts). Anyway, I had a lovely overnight oat with lingonberries and the kids had toast, waffles with cream and nutella. We cuddles on the sofas until nine and then we checked out. We got the car and drove to Gillis football training

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Sally and I visited the ducks and played at the playground. We weren’t allowed to go home because of the house viewing.

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After football we went to Långängen and had lunch with Michaela and little Andrea and Gustav. Our kids are very close which is fun. I’ve also eaten the most delicious freshly baked bread with butter in a very long time. Rustic, dark, fluffy and hard edges. Yum! Långängen is a gem on Lidingö. Definitely worth a visit.

Odd picked up the kids at one. It’s his week really but I’m grateful for borrowing them a while. He had missed a few days so they’re staying with them until Wednesday. I’m usually able to say goodbye without any issues but today it hurt. I saw the Gillis could tell and tried to hold it together for his sake. The last thing I want to give him is the weight of my emotions. I told him ”This is great Gillis, now you get to have time with daddy and the cats and I can exercise and work.” I remember so clearly from my own childhood that it was important to see my parents happy around goodbye. The opposite hurt so much.

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After we said goodbye I went to exercise. 1,5 hour weight lifting. Then I went home, the viewing was successful so we’ll see if I get any offers. I’m the kind of person who never worries and everything usually works out in one way or another. Either the house is sold now or I’ll have to rent it out. I’ve made sure I have an economic back up that means I don’t have to worry for a good long while. It’s a wonderful feeling to be so independent.

Now I’m having manicure and pedicure at home. After that I have an evening to myself. I’m going to have a delicious dinner, do a facemask and prepare work for the week ahead. I’m off to Kritianstad tomorrow morning for an industry and commerce day.

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